Incredibly accurate and comforting reading for myself on my new cards that I’m very much connecting to. 💚
I have such a hard time allowing myself to be vulnerable and trusting myself when it comes to my love life. (I’ve been known to make some poor choices!) Over the past few months I’ve been doing a lot of work in and around my heart-space and man has it been painful. Clearing out the old and all of the shields to make space for new.
Thanksgiving, is not an easy holiday for many people.
All of the gratitude, giving thanks for family and friends and the life you have isn’t very much fun if you don’t feel like you have any.
Why am I still fighting?
This is a question that I asked myself a lot during my last rounds of treatment while the medicine was making me so ill every day, on top of fighting this horrendous disease, and the truth is, I didn’t always have an answer.
Do you ever think to yourself, what the fuck am I doing with my life and what do I even want?
My views on what is truly important in this life and what makes a person valuable have changed significantly since getting sick. I suppose this shouldn’t surprise me, as it is a message that one will often hear from someone who has gone through a near death experience, a life-altering accident, or terminal or chronic illness.
It’s my 10 year reunion in a couple of weeks…
I already skipped the SDSS one, but now my first ever boyfriend and his amazing fiance are convincing me to go to DSS’s and although there is a part of me that wants to go, I cannot believe how just the sight of certain people on that invitation list can bring me right back to my fearful, insecure, high school-self who never felt like she fit into her own skin and was sure that she’d never be good enough.
I don’t know how much longer I can go on like this. No one told me when I got sick that I’d spend more time comforting the people around me than I would being comforted.
& Lyme Prevention Tips
I just had an amazing weekend away at Campbell Bay Music Festival on Mayne Island, BC. It was an incredible weekend spent listening to great music with the most beautiful people on breathtaking farms and in magical forests. Seriously I walked into the field and couldn’t help but think, “these are my people.”. We walked around in bare feet and sat on blankets in both the light of the sun and the moon; we swam in ponds and walked through the woods and sat in the forest. It was everything I love and more (minus the makeshift outhouses!).
So here’s the thing.
I love my natural curls (finally). I love the natural creases around my eyes that will one day be deep wrinkles. I love my natural grey-white hairs (though I do have way more of them than I think I should for 27!). A lot of my life in the beauty industry has been about covering up that natural beauty, changing it in some way because it’s not pretty enough. When that change is solely because you as an individual want to look a certain way for self-expression and to look the way you feel, then I love everything about that. Why shouldn’t you get to look exactly how you feel you want to look? And why would anyone other than you, have a right to an opinion on that? They don’t. They may think they do, but I’m telling you, they don’t. Don’t ever listen to anyone’s version of beauty but your own.
Dear Doctor’s, there’s something you need to understand…
I believed you every single time you misdiagnosed me.